Yesterday, I bought my first ever piece of a girls’ school uniform.
Have you started buying uniforms for next year yet?
And is there anything so nerve wracking as choosing a school?
My first time was especially emotional and complicated as my first son has significant additional needs.
This is him on his first day, so sweet! He’s a huge heavy metal-loving, drum-paying teenager now. Amazing.
Continue reading “Good Enough Mum – Choosing Schools + Stillness”
Of course, when one’s husband is an International Man of Mystery, it goes with the territory that he travels. But travelling for work can get out of hand.
Take 2010 and 2011 when he did a rotation in Yemen. In the oil industry, a rotation is a common thing in more dodgy locations. He did a 28:28 rotation ie 28 days straight work then 28 days off. Travel days are part of the days off, boo hoo.
So my Intn’l Man of Mystery would generally be away for four and a half weeks and then home for three and a half weeks. Overall, he liked it, the black and whiteness of it. He was either working or with the family, no overlap.
Continue reading “Grateful My Husband is Here Not There June 2011”
As a sharp contrast to the humid heat here in Sydney, here are some photos of my gorgeous two nephews who live in Nairn in the far north east of Scotland.
My sister Morag took these photos at the great playground by the sea one frosty winter’s morning. Thanks Mo!
The twins and I had a lovely expedition first thing on New Year’s morning.
Starting the year well. Apart from their incessant bickering, that is!
The two of them re-enact the battle of the sexes on a daily basis.
Clearly their New Year’s Resolution wasn’t to achieve a peaceable relationship, or even a truce. I’d settle for armed neutrality. Sigh…
Anyway, here are some photos of this morning’s expedition and some thoughts on how I’d love 2012 to continue:
I’d love to report that the rest of New Year’s Day 2012 was equally fun. But life’s not like that and this family has had some very trying times this afternoon and evening.
Ah well, no doubt that’s also how the year will continue too. Because our life will insist on being real life, as will everyone else’s. Because life IS like that.
Hope you’ve had a (mostly) jolly start to 2012.
Mothers’ Groups are an Australian institution, but one that can cause mixed feelings amongst those of us whose children turn out not to fit the ‘norm.’
I’m going out to see the Old Trolls tonight, and I can’t wait. Our monthly get-togethers are the highlight of my scintillating* social life.
You see, the Old Trolls** is my mothers’ group, the contemporaries whose kids are like my kid, whose lives were turned topsy turvy like mine was, who now share the experience of parenting a teenager on the autism spectrum.
Continue reading “My Real Mothers’ Group”
Funny how a photograph can catapult us back in time, help us see how far we have come, how much we have learned.
This is a photo of Lyne Park Playground in Rose Bay, Sydney. I took it recently, but look at it today and the years fall away. This playground has been the scene of many emotions in my family’s journey:
We had moved from Karachi, Pakistan to Sydney in 1998. Going from being a young, free and single TV producer in Glasgow to a mother of one living with guards behind barbed wire fences in Karachi had been gruelling. So had motherhood itself and learning to live with a partner. And there were few outdoors places to go with a baby.
To be in Sydney and free to wander, with fantastic outdoor spaces was joyful.
Why were so many kids sitting on their mothers knees, showing their mothers things and crying and running to mum when they hurt themselves? Jeez, loads of those children are so wimpy.
Look at my little lad, he’s up and down that play equipment like a yoyo and he never cries or whinges for me.
Actually, that is odd, isn’t it. I don’t think he finds me very interesting. (Ouch, it took almost 18 more motnhs for him to diagnosed as having autism spectrum disorder. Ouch, ouch, ouch.)
After that diagnosis, I would sit in Lyne Park sometimes and cry, watching my son playing by himself, climbing, crawling, banging, leaping. Other three years olds were playing side by side, or chasing, running, they were talking.
Talking! Playing! Proper playing; so that’s what it looks like. Would my son ever talk? Would he ever have a friend? What would our life be like?
Ten years on and I know the answers to those questions were yes, yes and blessed. I wish I could wrap my past self up a huge warm blanket and to tell her that it will all work out OK. Not perfect, not even really normal, but fine, blessed, all right.
I laugh when I hear people say they don’t like playgrounds. My son was so very hyperactive, it was so good for him to go to them, and I was so grateful to be in a safe, clean outdoor space with him. I had to learn to love playgrounds, so I did. OK, I think I may have become a bit obsessed in fact but you’ll forgive me for that.
Where’s your favourite outdoor space? Do you like the places your kids love
If you’re in need of any help with the kids, can I recommend Dr James Best’s new website Parenting For Today?
Dr James Best and his wife Benison O’Reilly are good family friends of ours. We first met many years ago at a group for parents of children with autism. Benison O’Reilly and I co-wrote the first edition of the Australian Autism Handbook and also Beyond The Baby Blues.
James is a GP and a very handy person to ask for medical advice, he’s very patient and calm. I’m very lucky to have he and Benison as friends.
James has just started a website www.drjamesbest.com where he writes about children’s health and development.
These are the posts and videos James has on the site so far.
Episode 1 – Have you ever wondered what kind of a parent you want to be?
Episode 6 – The play age – part 1
Episode 7 – The play age – part 2
Episode 8 The primary school years
Episode 10 – Parental baggage and expectations
Episode 11 – Nurturing and attachment
James has a 300 page ebook called Kidsense which is full of great info and good sense and is available from the Dr James Best website.
In August Dr James Best will have a book published by Allen and Unwin. It’s called ‘Sam’s Best Shot’ and is the story of an autism adventure in Africa.
Sam and James spent six months travelling in Africa, with the aim of helping Sam’s overall development. The book looks terrific. Here’s where you can find more info as the book is published.
Sam’s Best Shot on Allen and Unwin website
Is really quite easy!
Call me old-fashioned, but I love a fresh start. And here are my resolutions for the year:
* NOT TO WRITE ANY BOOKS!!!!
* To READ more lots and lots of books
* To slow down, slowly, surely and steadily
* Take more exercise, a LOT more
* To stay at the same weight all year, maybe drop a little, NO WEIGHT PUT ON
* Get the bairns eating a wider variety of healthy grub
* Cook more, and more varied meals
* Put lots of time and effort into readjusting to a more typical family life when IMOM comes home for good.
* To support the three books I have written, keep websites up to date, blog a little, don’t get obsessed
To track it all, here on this blog and check in monthly to see how we are going
Seana Lucy Smith 